Wonder Weasels’ Wunderkind

The sports’ world is still quivering from the seismic shake up in the Carly Bowl. Disgraced former manager Mike Kruse was announced as a Co-Manager for the perennially impotent One Eyed Wonder Weasels. But thanks to the tireless and reckless speculation of our investigation team, we have reason to believe that this recent acquisition was only possible due to a recent cash infusion.

Kruse dons a heavy price tag, much like a meal in an airport terminal or a Furby at Christmas. And although there is no doubt he will add sizzle to the Weasel’s mule steak fajitas, where did the resources come from to acquire him? Surely not from the calcified creases of Kohorst’s miserly wallet. No, there has to be a third man.

And we believe it’s no other than fellow St. Michael’s alum George Esquivel. He already donates to several charities with similar endeavors: Helping Hands Monkey Helpers and Day Care for Dads.

We’ll see if this triumvirate will survive the brutal competition of the Carly Bowl or if this is simply the beginning of a hostile take over. Most experts believe the later and that by season’s end: to the Papi goes the Weasels.